Natalia Levis-Fox and Fast Solutions: July 2014

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Mind Reading or ‘What Do They Think of Me?’

Mind reading is a habit. It originates from childhood. It had been formed in hostile or aggressive surroundings to protect your life. It seems as if you were born in the wrong family or community. Mind reading or ‘What do they think of me?’ appeared as a defending mechanism to survive in unfriendly social environments without your permission.

You were young and inexperienced. Your naivety and absolute trust to parents, caregivers and educators gave rise to what we call in psychology “inveriority complex” and “self-doubt”. They would tell you, that you are not good or normal, etc. And you accepted this as reliable truth.

I have good news for you.

It is not YOU, who is not good.

It is THEM who were ugly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is them, who had installed their crooked mentality into you… and you believed them…

I bet you were fighting their dirty opinion all your life, and had been proving to yourself and others that you are great, worthy, admirable and valuable. Right? You achieved splendid success in every sphere of your grown-up life.

As a matter of fact, you are wonderful, very human, intelligent, worthy, delicate. You are a great and reliable friend. You had never betrayed anybody. You help others and you understand their needs. You fight for somebody else’s rights, forgetting about your own. You never ask anybody for your own good. You do and organize things yourself. You are noble.

Actually, your nature is so extraordinary, that it pushed you to leave people and places and where you felt awfully in the earlier period.

The horrible information about past times is good for you. Surprised? It is the negative model of how people and relationships are not to be in your own life!

Yet, the habit of reading somebody else’s thoughts remained. Unfortunately, you do it almost unconsciously, when you find yourself in novel situations with as great people, as you are! Nevertheless, you try to find out if you are really good or worthy.

This habit is also trigged automatically by comparing yourself with other real or imagined people.

The word ‘com-pare’ consists of two parts. Latin [com] means ‘together with’. [pare] – ‘match’ or ‘pair’. Comparing on the deepest level is the process, by which we make ourselves equal to somebody else, as if we check our matching with others.

There is another negative side of this ‘comparing process’ and ‘mind reading’. When we try and ‘read’ people’s thoughts, we get directly into their unpleasant past, where their worst events, sufferings, opinions, critics and attitudes are kept. You get into ‘rubbish’ – sort of painful memories - people actively avoid and escape themselves.

Guess what ‘answer’ we get from this mind reading about ourselves? – Exactly! – The worst!!!!!!!!!!

And what conclusions do we arrive at? – Most unfavorable!!!!!!!!! And we believe them! Taking this ‘received’ information for granted, as the truth, we feel awful.

Comparing yourself to others and competing with them, probably is good in sports and in pure men’s groups. Competition and being the winner in racing, skiing, firing and other popular men’s activities produces testosterone – male’s hormone, which makes men as real men – strong, handsome, sexy and attractive.

Biologically, we have apparatus for reading people and animals. Thanks to scientific discovery of ‘mirror neurons’ existence in our brains, we can read only intentions, understand and imitate actions (Rizzolatti, et al., 2008, 2014; Heyes, 2014; Fogassi et al. 2005; Iacoboni et al., 2005).

Mirror neurons distribution in brain

Mirror neurons are also active when people experience an emotion (disgust, happiness, pain, etc.) Thanks to these neurons we can join others in co-experiencing and understanding empathy.

You can easily get access to the process of imitation and experience pleasure when we see romantic, erotic and porno films as if it is happening in reality! Maybe one day I will tell you more about these neurons.

Mirror neurons may provide the neurological basis of human self-awareness. These neurons can not only help simulate other people's behavior but can be turned 'inward'—as it were—to create second-order representations or meta-representations of your own earlier brain processes. This could be the neural basis of introspection, and of the reciprocity of self awareness and other awareness (Ramachandran, 2009).

This skill of reading intentions of others is very useful in professions connected to risks: police, army, rescue, etc. But reading and interfering with thoughts of other people during communication or even at distance is not a good thing in everyday life. It is a special skill used for special goals in intelligence and influencing population.

Ask yourself a question:

What can I do to get rid of the habit of mind reading and wondering “What they think of me”?

We shall discuss the outcomes tomorrow

If you have any original ideas, leave a comment. Do not be shy. I know, that my articles are addressed into your depths, hidden from others. People consider them very personal. As people, we all have a lot of in common, from typical idiotism & fears to uniqueness & divinity in us.

Natalia Levis-Fox

On-line consultations

License No 314265119000560

www.natalialevisfox.com

Scientific references

Fogassi Leonardo, Pier , Ferrari Francesco, Gesierich Benno, Rozzi Stefano, Chersi Fabian, Rizzolatti Giacomo (2005). "Parietal lobe: from action organization to intention understanding". Science308 (5722): 662–667. Bibcode:2005Sci...308..662F. doi:10.1126/science.1106138.PMID 15860620.
Heyes, Cecilia, Tinbergen on mirror neurons. Philosophical Transactions Of The Royal Society B-Biological Sciences Volume: 369 Issue: 1644 Special Issue:SI Article Number: 20130180 Published: JUN 5 2014.
Iacoboni M, Molnar-Szakacs I, Gallese V, Buccino G, Mazziotta JC, et al. Grasping the Intentions of Others with One's Own Mirror Neuron System. PLoS Biol 3(3): e79. 2005.
Oberman LM, Hubbard EM, McCleery JP, Altschuler EL, Ramachandran VS, Pineda JA., EEG evidence for mirror neuron dysfunction in autism spectral disorders, Brain Res Cogn Brain Res.; 24(2):190-8, 2005-06.
Oberman, L.; Ramachandran, V.S. (2009). "Reflections on the Mirror Neuron System: Their Evolutionary Functions Beyond Motor Representation". In Pineda, J.A. Mirror Neuron Systems: The Role of Mirroring Processes in Social Cognition. Humana Press. pp. 39–62. ISBN 978-1-934115-34-3.
Ramachandran, V.S. (January 1, 2009). "Self Awareness: The Last Frontier, Edge Foundation web essay". Retrieved July 26, 2011.
Rizzolatti, Giacomo; Fogassi, Leonardo The mirror mechanism: recent findings and perspectives. Philosophical Transactions Of The Royal Society B-Biological Sciences Volume: 369 Issue: 1644 Special Issue:SI Article Number: 20130420 Published: JUN 5 2014
Rizzolatti, Giacomo; Sinigaglia, Corrado; Anderson, Frances (Trans) Mirrors in the brain: How our minds share actions and emotions. New York, NY, US: Oxford University Press. (2008). xiii 242 pp.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Quote about Healing and Mutual Erotic Love

Yes, these are my words. I told them once during one of my lectures on Psychology of wellness and NLP. I read this course together with lectures on Anthropology at the Faculty of Psychology (Institute of Humanity) for several years.

I met one of my ex-students lately and he reminded me of these words. Like me he works in one of the private clinics as a special invitee for ‘difficult’ patients. He applies this approach in his clinical practice with brilliant results.

Life is full of surprises!

I am too lazy to work for somebody else, dealing with sick people (and sometimes doctors) on everyday basis, month after month, year after year.

For this reason I chose to do what I love: creating artworks, travelling, racing, skiing, piloting flying machines, doing scientific research in order to write books with reliable information on psychology of intelligence, wellness, pleasure and emotions (my 22 books are published at Smashwords Inc, USA). If you do not believe, you can check at http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/389009

I also consult people who need fast and satisfying results by phone, no Skype is used.

This is my office, with delightful and comforting light

and very friendly art and creative atmosphere

Sometimes we find ourselves in the worst environments, without pleasant and understanding support. At times of desperation, doubts and uneasiness we need to hear encouraging words oe just hints to find better solutions… That is why I organized this service.

How can we do the best things for you over the phone?

Human voice, its tember and the personal choice of words helps to diagnose any psychological problem within minutes. In reality, each ‘problem’ has its own components, organized in a structure and mental strategy and trigged in different life contexts. You have 3 free minutes to find out what we can do together

Details at

http://www.natalialevisfox.com/on-line_consultations.html

The principle of the ‘problem’ maintenance reminds of a formula in Higher mathematics. For instance, depressed people combine all the events together, generalize them into negative quality and suffer, thus forming a vicious, repeated circle:

Events → interpreting them with negative shades → integrating and labeling them as ‘life is horrible’ → black thoughts and self-talking→ suffering

What can we do about it?

We change the unpleasant contents into the person’s desirable outcomes, and the results are pleasing. In other words we put your current desires, wishes and needs into this formula. You feel immediately better!

Events → interpreting them with positive shades → integrating and labeling them as ‘life is funny’ (my boss is silly, boyfriend is not good, etc) → remember your best qualities → add nice thoughts and positive self-talking→ enjoying the situation → spirits rise

Easy, is it not? When you get into trouble, you do not see the solution, right? But together, we manage it fine…

Note. I never consult depressed people on phone. They are sticky. They always complain and they ‘fuck your brains’, as they find “free ears” to pour out their negative stories and attitudes into you. Sorry for vulgar terminology, but all highly qualified doctors and therapists understand me perfectly. It is not a paradise to deal with this category of patients.

These people cause the explosion, the outburst of anger in me. No money can ever justify time and best efforts to get them out of depression without their sincere will to get rid of it.

In reality, depressed patients love their states as they have no intelligence and fresh energy to find new life challenges by themselves. Nasty, but true.

Anyway, people who got stuck in depression can become as joyful and happy as any ‘normal’ and healthy person. The problem with depressed people is that their life is nourished by alien (second-hand) energy source. That is why to heal depression as well as alcoholism completely is almost impossible.

Research states that anti-depressants kill their sex energy. Sex energy is the only vital energy we have at our disposal. It makes us happy, wishing the best, vibrating and satisfied. Drugs such as Prozac work by keeping serotonin hanging around in the brain for longer than normal, so they might stave off romantic feelings. (This also means that people taking anti-depressants may be jeopardising their ability to fall in love.)

There is a special 2 staged program for depressed people, which shifts from foreign mind and connects them to a healthy, unlimited and fresh source of vitality supply (first stage) and then forms a new, healthy type of mentality of a happy person (second stage). This program is very expensive, takes ar least 8-12 days and is realized with me in the Caucasus,

Respectable Hotel Edelweis

Close to Elbrus

in wonderful

quiet

well-organized

and comfortable environments

we can even ski with you

If you can not yet, I will train you!

Can you imagine yourself, sliding and flying in snow... part of a fashionable style of life... without addictions and depression?

So, if you are life-time depressed, do not bother to ask for my nice friendly help and make me listen to your sad stories over the phone. Join my program!

Sometimes yours,

Natalia Levis-Fox

On-line consultations

License No 314265119000560

www.natalialevisfox.com

Neurobiology of Love and Sex (Part 3)

Continued from

Part 1

http://natalia-levis-fox.blogspot.ru/2014/07/neurobiology-of-love-sex-and-bonding.html

Part 2

http://natalia-levis-fox.blogspot.ru/2014/07/neurobiology-of-love-sex-and-bonding_25.html

Today we shall speak with you about two very important things, concerning love, sex and lovemaking. It is what we call ‘fucking’ and ‘loving’. Both things are good. Nevertheless, they differ in quality.

‘Fucking’ as pure sex – lust expression- is more like eating simple food (whatever you can find) for the reason of being ‘hungry’. It brings more ‘mechanical’ satisfaction, i.e. stomach is filled, rather than pleasure in all our human aspects.

‘Loving’ is more like a complex pleasure of enjoying tasty, delicious and juicy food, every portion of it. Lovemaking is more like erotic love, which encompasses such human aspects as delight of communication prior to intimate relationship, warmth, mutual understanding, total approval, absence of criticism and complete partner’s acceptance; incredible comfort in each other’s presence, joy and happiness, the feeling of ‘flight’ and easiness, desire to prolong contact in every form.

Erotic love expresses itself long before the sexual act as it is. It manifests itself with absolute friendly atmosphere between the two, the loving eyes of your partner, caressing your face, hands and appearance with affection, even without physical touch.

You completely forget about yourself! You stop wondering about what your partner thinks about you, or what impression you produce. You stop demonstrating yourself and play ‘do-I-look-good-for-you’ sort of games.

Erotic love combines both lust and incredible fondness, which we call ‘romantic love’ and long-term pair formation for pleasure being together.

The thing is that our bodies immediately recognize the best sexual and soul partner for us, before this information gets to our conscious understanding.

In the presence of our best love partner, even admiring their photographs, our nature releases a bouquet of substances through body, blood and brain. That is why we feel wonderful, looking forward to meet our beloved person.

Erotic lovemaking brings the partners into the state of ecstasy, when every touch, caressing lifts them to amazing mutual delight, lasting long…

After this highly agreeable sex love shameless experience, partners feel fascinating long lasting happiness. It all makes them impossible to part with each other.

If you have experience in reading and understanding scientific research on neurobiology to find the proofs and get the holistic picture of natural love processes, you can use the reference list of articles at the bottom of this post.

Next time we shall discuss “Pleasure” and “Violence”, their origin as the result of “Sensory Deprivation” from childhood across different cultures.

If you have difficulties in experiencing ecstatic feelings because of your shyness, we can talk over the phone and open your wonderful erotic love potential.

Just imagine, how your fantastically beautiful sensations will make your sex-love-making experience satisfying… before you decide to call.

I wish you all the pleasure you desire,

Natalia Levis-Fox

On-line consultations

License No 314265119000560

www.natalialevisfox.com

Scientific references

Bartels Andreas and Zeki Semir, The neural basis of romantic love, NeuroReport 11:3829±3834, 2000.
Cabanac M., Emotion and phylogeny. Jpn J Physiol 1999 Feb; 49(1):1-10.
Cantor JM, Binik YM, Pfaus JG, Chronic fluoxetine inhibits sexual behaviorin the male rat: reversal with oxytocin. Psychopharmacology (Berl) 1999 Jun; 144(4):355-62.
Cushing BS, Carter CS. Prior exposure to oxytocin mimics the effects of social contact and facilitates sexual behaviour in females. J Neuroendocrinol 1999 Oct;11(10):765-9.
Fisher H., Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love”. Henry Holt and Company, New York.
Lane RD, Reiman EM, Ahern GL et al. Am J Psychiatry 154, 926±933 (1997).
Paradiso S, et al., Cerebral Blood Flow Changes Associated With Attribution of Emotional Valence to Pleasant, Unpleasant, and Neutral Visual Stimuli in a PET Study of Normal Subjects. Am J Psychiatry 156:1618-1629, October 1999.
Salamon, E., Esch, T., STEFANO, G.B. Role of amygdala in mediating sexual and emotional behavior via coupled nitric oxide release. Acta Pharmacologica Sinica 2005 Apr; 26 (4): 389-395.
Smock T, Albeck D, Stark P, A peptidergic basis for sexual behavior in mammals. Prog Brain Res 1998;119:467-81.
Turner RA, Altemus M, Enos T, Cooper B, McGuinness T Preliminary research on plasma oxytocin in normal cycling women: investigating emotion and interpersonal distress. Psychiatry 1999 Summer; 62(2):97-113.