Each of us has a special apparatus of recognizing people and their qualities.
It is of double origin coming of:
1. Nature itself. On the biological level, we feel immediately, if this or that person is good to us. If the person is good, then we have the same substances in the body, brain and blood. It is biological unity between people. It makes us feeling physically good in each other’s presence and even in memory about certain events.
The most vivid example of natural likeness is the state of alcoholic intoxication. Drunken people have the same biology for a short period.
French friends, wine makers
Alcohol releases dopamine – the neurosubstances of feeling good, brave and daring
and endorphins - that produce feelings of pleasure and reward.
Read my articles “Why Alcohol Is Addicting? (Part I)
Why Alcohol Is Addicting? (Part II)
The same natural mechanisms are true about sex relationships. You have erotic desire only towards a man or a woman, who is biologically good for your body as experience maximum sexual pleasure and satisfying intensity of orgasms. Heterosexual relationships are complimentary on physical level. Homosexual pairs are formed mostly on social acceptance and the lack of tenderness from opposite gender.
2.Mind-Heart unity. On the intellectual and emotional levels, we immediately understand if we have similar human qualities with another person. If you are kind, friendly, intelligent, clever, tender, advantageous, etc, then you will immediately recognize these qualities in another person. It usually happens unconsciously, skipping our conscious analysis at the initial stage of acquaintance or social contacts.
If your qualities (ex, kindness, friendliness, cleverness, intelligence, advantageousness, tenderness, etc) are missing in another person – they would never understand and value you as a personality and a human being…
On the contrary, if both people possess the same qualities and the likewise biology, they feel incredible comfort in each other’s presence. This is how best friends appear as well as couples with lovely relationships are formed.
We understand, want to know, appreciate and deal only with those people who have many things in common with us.
Send good words and wishes to those you value and understand.