Why do some men have trouble accepting compliments?
The real issue here is wrapped up in low self-esteem, which we do not often associate with men. But they have to deal with that just like women do, even though it plays out in their lives is slightly different ways.
Low self-esteem is a learned behavior. There are almost always particular experiences that play into a man's shyness or embarrassment around taking a compliment.
The thing is that this type of men lived all their lives in rather poor or limited social (women’s) environments. In this atmosphere, compliments are not considered as a normal thing.
When you have something going wrong for a long period of time (not the way you prefer), you tend to try and grow yourself a Teflon coating to protect your heart and soul. Instead of being a contented love sponge, you're more of a non-stick surface that nothing can penetrate... Not even a sincere, loving compliment.
It feels deeply pleasurable to give a sincere compliment, but receiving one takes more work. In order to successfully receive a compliment, you have to be confident in yourself and in the sincerity of the person who's saying the nice thing about you. If you are feeling at all vulnerable or insecure, it can be nearly impossible to gracefully receive a compliment.
So, if you are sort of ‘shy’ in receiving compliments from women, belonging to different social groups (from yours) and you are not sure about the sincerity of received compliments, you may do the following things:
1. Take as a fact the notion of “compliment” as some wonderful input into your personality. The notion comes from Italian word complimento – “expression of respect and civility”.
2. Take a sheet a paper and write all compliments you received from different women in different periods of life.
Make a table: ‘compliment’ → ‘woman’ → ‘her social group/status’
3. When the list is ready. Check out, which of the received compliments correspond to your own understanding of you and resonate with your skills and personal qualities, etc.
The points of mutual coincidence bear witness that this woman or women understand and value you the way you are! Their compliments are always sincere.
You trigger "high value" circuits in their mental ‘model of great men’.
This "high value" model of you can be easily created within minutes! With these circuits and model, you will be treated like a King in every social group.
This professional secret will be yours during our one-hour on-line consultation.
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