2 days ago I was sent a very useful book as a gift. This ebook put many things in their proper place in my consciousness. This genius book was written by 28 years old Alden Tan in a peculiar style. Below is the short version of it, written as citation.
“12 Things Happy People Don't Give A Fuck About”
"To see the world, things dangerous to come to,
to see behind walls, to draw closer,
to find each other and to feel.
That is the purpose of life."
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
1) They Don't Give A Fuck About What Others Think
Happy people don't care about what others think about them. They are not afraid of the words and thoughts of others. Why? Because they're not real.
People who spend their time judging you are insecure losers themselves. When they speak out to bring others down, they're just trying to validate their own shitty lives.
Why let a bunch of ignorant comments from ignorant people get you down?
2) They Don't Give A Fuck About The Past Or Future
You read that right. Not only do happy don't give two craps about the past... but also the future itself!
Happy people let go of the past man. They know that it's all in the past and that they can't do anything to change it. They let go of that tight grip and look forward.
And yet, they don't have a bunch of high expectations. Yep. They let go of expectations, which tends to lift you up only to let you down.
As for the future, well, some form of planning and goal-setting is good, but let go of expectations. Don't create all these ideas in your head about how you want things to happen.
So how do you let go of the future too?
Do things for the sake of doing!
Live in the present man. Be in the now. Learn how to meditate. Break out of routine.
Appreciate things all around you, like nature. That helps tremendously.
3) They Don't Give A Fuck About Fear
Happy people gain a lot of their happiness from not allowing fear to taking over them.
Look, fear is natural, but it doesn't mean you should allow it to break you.
Happy people muster up their courage and continuously get shit done.
What you can do to eliminate fear in your life Fake it till you make it. You ought to.
When you fake it, it automatically shows that your body and mind are fully capable of
carrying out the act itself.
You don't have to look back and keep asking, "What if?".
4) They Don't Give A Fuck About Social Media
Social media may be cool and all when it comes to connecting us with one another and quickly catching up with news and stuff. But the problem isn't about it taking over our lives, as people like to put it.
The problem comes when we start using social media subconsciously without even realizing it. That's when you're being taken over.
Happy people drop social media. Some do it completely or cut down at a huge rate. They get happy by being more aware of what's going on around them and indulging in more meaningful activities.
Now, go find other meaningful shit to do. Go read. Books are awesome.
Life is too short to randomly surf social media for an update that doesn't add any kind of value to your life.
5) They Don't Give A Fuck About The State Of The World
Straight up, the state of the world is a sorry one. There's war, rape, disasters and bad shit happening to innocent people. It's easy to be affected to the point of depression or as if you shouldn't start trying to make the world a better place at all.
But... Happy people don't give a fuck about how shitty this world is. Now, it's not they don't care. They do. They just don't let it get to them! Happy people know that feeling unhappy and bitching about everything wouldn't change anything. They block out the bad stuff and make sure it doesn't paralyze them.
As a single person, a happy person can make a huge difference. They show kindness and compassion and give a helping hand. It's as simple as that.
What you can do to not let the world get to you. Just because your friend posted a disturbing, gory video on Facebook doesn't mean you got to watch it. It's not worth ruining your day.
Do what you love, let that love inspire others and keep helping others when you can.
The state of the world may not change overnight, but you can change a life easily by showing some love to your fellow man.
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6) They Don't Give A Fuck About Age
Ahh... age! There sets apart the young and the old right?
Happy people don't think that way! They don't give a fuck about that number that is attached to their life.
Why? Because age is just a number. Period. End of story.
It should never dictate your life. It should never dictate the things you do and ultimately your happiness. Happy people do whatever it is they want, regardless of their age.
It's never too late.
Start hanging out with people who willingly do what they want despite their age.
What does this mean? It means hanging out with real friends who'd willingly encourage you to do what you love to.
And when you start doing what you love, you won't feel old at all because that awesome feeling is all you need.
If you hang out with a bunch of a friends who keep telling you to act your age, like telling you to get married and shit, you're going to feel old. If you have friends who respect each others' way of life and are always out to have fun together, age can get the fuck out.
7) They Don't Give A Fuck About Pleasing Everybody
Why? Because you can't please everybody in life. Happy people know that.
Somewhere along the way in life, you're bound to encounter people who'd have a problem with you.
Why? It doesn't fucking matter.
Happy people recognize when somebody in life doesn't suit them, and they willingly walk away.
They know that trying to be nice and pleasing everybody just doesn't work at all.
What you can do to cut out pleasing people. You stop being so nice. You need to let go of the notion that being nice is the way to go all the time. You need to drop the idea that in some human-nature way you need to be nice to everybody you meet.
Recognize the toxic people in your life. If you are unhappy with somebody, walk away. Stop hanging out with them then. Start hanging out with positive people only.
If someone has a problem with you, that's their problem. Not yours.
8) They Don't Give A Fuck About Money
Okay for sure, money is important.
But you know how happy people see it? They know that money at the end of the day, is just paper. They release their attachment from it.
And they also know that down the road, the notion of how money can never buy happiness is very true.
Happy people focus their energy on other things while living with money. They live life to the fullest and start allowing the experiences and lessons create more meaning for them.
They let go of the chase.
So if you want to be happy, don't chase. Live within your means. Do what you have to do to survive.
Then keep doing what you love, live life to the fullest and recognize the other great things in life that can come to you without having to buy it. Your bank account wouldn't matter when you look back in life on your deathbed. Your experience and memories do.
9) They Don't Give A Fuck About Work That Much
Well no one is expecting you to just quit your job and run away from your responsibilities. That's just... irresponsible.
But happy people have truly achieved the balance between their happiness and their jobs.
They don't let their job define them.
They also most certainly don't let their toxic colleagues, their shitty boss and the awful politics which it all bring to take over their lives.
Happy people go to work, punch in, do their best, ignore all the bullshit and then go home with a nice pay check.
Are you doing the same?
Let go of shitty bosses and annoying colleagues. They belong in the office, not your life.
It doesn't, and will never define you. You know what can help define you?
1) The passion you have, in which you have something to love and you become known for that love, thus inspiring others.
2) The love and compassion you show for others, because helping others is out of textbook, something a job or school can never teach you.
10) They Don't Give A Fuck About Annoying "Friends"
Everybody has friends, but unfortunately, a lot of us have a very skewed definition of what friends mean.
As a result, they hang out with the wrong people in life. Are you in a situation where you hang out with a group of "friends", but one or two of them annoy you?
You don't even like them, but you are always civil with them (because it's the right thing to do) and end up calling them "friends".
And then... you end up being unhappy with certain friends?
Happy people have friends, but they are true friends who only lift them up higher.
They make no exceptions and no excuses when it comes to friendship.
What you can do to foster real friendships.
Hang out with positive people only. And I do mean ONLY. Go all in, and go for 100%.
Make no exceptions.
Who you constantly surround yourself with can largely make a huge difference in your happiness.
11) They Don't Give A Fuck About Society's Standards
"You need to be married by 30"
"You need to go to college and get a degree"
These are the things I've actually been told in life.
Happy people don't give a fuck about the rules, standards and whatever society supposedly sets for us.
Happy people jump off the bandwagon, decide they don't want to be sheep and just do what they love!
What you can do to defy all the rules.
Find passion. Nothing else matters.
What makes you happy? What makes you feel on top of the world? What lights your fire? (begin each day with this question)
Only you know. Only you can answer those questions. Nobody else can.
12) They Don't Give A Fuck About Different Ideas Of Happiness
Do you get it now? After reading everything do you get it?
Happiness comes from within!
Happy people just aim to be happy, or rather, happy people are already happy and they leave it as that.
You can reach Alden by email and ask a copy of his book